Movie Review: The Green Inferno

Director: Eli Roth

Starring: Lorenza Izzo, Ariel Levy, Daryl Sabara, Kirby Bliss Blanton

WARNING: THIS POST DOES CONTAIN SPOILERS!

Hey guys! Cyrille here with a shiny, new movie review to entertain the masses! This time, I’ve brought along fellow Geekpr0n writer, horror-movie fan and actual-Paul Rudd clone, Geoff McGregor!

The Green Inferno, Eli Roth’s latest venture in “torture-porn” horror, follows a group of young students who travel to South America to protest a logging company from destroying acres of trees and endangering the lives of the ancient tribes that live in that area. Lorenza Izzo plays Justine, who becomes enticed to join her school’s activist group after hearing the pleas and chants led by the ambitious leader, Alejandro (Ariel Levy). The group is successful in their protest but on the way back home, their plane crashes leaving them in the middle of the Amazon jungle near a very angry cannibal tribe. I think you can get what happens next.

Geoff: Haha, they get eaten!

Cyrille: Considering I watched Cannibal Holocaust with my eyes closed, I was expecting the same thing from The Green Inferno. I mean, even THE STEPHEN KING tweeted in favor of the movie:

THE GREEN INFERNO is like a glorious throwback to the drive-in movies of my youth: bloody, gripping, hard to watch, but you can’t look away.

— Stephen King (@StephenKing) September 18, 2015

Geoff: To be fair, Cannibal Holocaust is actually pretty tame for today’s standards except for the real animal killings.

Cyrille: The dialogue wasn’t THAT bad — save for Sky Ferreira’s acting. She looked and acted like she just stumbled on set and the crew just thought, “Okay, let’s pick her, I guess.”. Lorenza Izzo played a convincing-enough college freshman — did you see how easily manipulated she was by Alejandro and Co.? Thankfully, we’re not in the New York setting for that long. We finally get to South America and Eli Roth manages to capture really great shots of the busy city and later, the Amazon Rainforest. It’s a culture shock for sure.

Geoff: I liked how they spent the first act in the cities with the characters and introducing them to the audience. Granted, they were all horrible stereotypes and poorly written and developed.

Cyrille: Can we address how my childhood was ruined seeing Daryl Sabara’s penis? I think I spent that whole scene screaming, “Juni, no!” in my head.

Geoff: I remember watching Spy Kids when I was little for my birthday and I never though in a million years that one day I’d see this kid’s penis. That sounds bad, I know.

Cyrille: Everything actually goes pretty slow until the plane crash. We finally get to see the native tribe and the whole scene — from their capture to their arrival in the village — is dizzying, but in a good way. It was a great contrast of the tribespeople head-to-toe covered in red paint just talking over the screams and pleas of the activists. As someone who is completely claustrophobic, Roth managed to make you feel like you were the one with the tribespeople and their hands all over you, talking over you and knowing you’re dead meat (LOL pun intended).

Geoff: From the plane crash to the arrival in the village — the whole thing was a jarring experience because you’re never really allowed to get your bearings after that and you know it’s about to get a lot worse.

Cyrille: Don’t get me wrong — I LOVE horror movies but torture-porn DOES NOT do it for me. The worst scene that I literally couldn’t stomach was Jonah’s death. Considering he was the most likeable one out of the group, it sucked to see him go so quickly. I saw until the elder tribe woman ate his eye but after that, I covered my own eyes for the entire scene — Geoff tells me that they showed EVERYTHING. Guess I’m gonna be a vegetarian now.

Geoff: Clearly, this movie isn’t for everyone. I love horror movies too and I actually don’t mind torture-porn that much. I’ve watched movies with worse and I guess I’ve just gotten too desensitized that I watched the entire thing without looking away. This was the first big kill and it was definitely the most intense of the whole movie. After that, it kinda goes soft.

Cyrille: Everything after that scene wasn’t SO bad — but I still watched it with my hand over my face. Amy’s (Kirby Bliss Blanton) death didn’t have a big gore-factor but it’s the scene when Lars (Daryl Sabara) and Daniel (Nicolás Martínez) shoved the bag of weed down her throat that made me want to gag.

Geoff: How have you forgotten to mention that you actually got physically sick from watching this movie?

Cyrille: I get sick easily 🙁 I was enjoying this movie up until Alejandro’s super-awkward masterbating scene. Did they have to include that, really?

Geoff: I was fine with it. It was a weird change of pace but Eli Roth tends to have random comedic moments in all of his movies.

Cyrille: The movie slows down a bit but picks up again when Daniel and Justine manage to escape while the tribespeople get super high off of Amy’s dead body. The entire scene is laughable at best up until they get the munchies and literally devour Lars alive. RIP Juni Cortez 🙁

Geoff: That scene wasn’t that graphic — which I think is a missed opportunity. I’ve seen a lot worse from The Walking Dead. It was pretty funny when the child tribe member walked out of the crowd holding up his leg like it was a pinata prize.

Cyrille: Justine and Daniel actually don’t get away that easily, once they get to the crash site, they get captured again. These guys just don’t have the best of luck. The movie picks up again while the tribes women prepare for Justine’s genital mutilation — guess who just nope’d her way through the entire scene? This gal!

Geoff: The crash victims impaled on the poles was another nice homage to Cannibal Holocaust but unfortunately nowhere near as disturbing.

Cyrille: Lorenza Izzo actually makes a decent Final Girl and was really good at showing the naivete of her character in the beginning of the movie to becoming a strong woman in the end.

Geoff: I liked her character arc — you could really see the fear on her face. I mean the scene where she’s about to drown in the river was 100% real.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Cyrille: The Green Inferno promises gore but fails to deliver save for the one scene. The dialogue and the characters are “just alright” with little to no character development for most of the cast. It’s no Cannibal Holocaust.

Geoff: I was really looking forward to this movie for over two years. As a whole, I wasn’t disappointed but in the end, I was left wanting more. Obviously, the movie is a throwback to the classic 1980’s Italian cannibal films so I wasn’t expecting much from the characters but I was hoping for a little more in the gore department besides the promising first kill.

What did you guys think of The Green Inferno? Let us know in the comments!