Game Of Thrones Season 4 Trailer Is Here, And It’s Perfect.

HBO released the first official trailer for Game of Thrones Season 4 yesterday, and HHNNNGGGHHH.

When we were last in Westeros…things were kind of going to shit. let’s sum things up a bit (SPOILERS FOR SEASON 3):

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I mean it!  I SPOIL ALL THE THINGS up ahead so if you’re not caught up, look away now!!

• Rob and Catelyn made a million terrible decisions, and along with their entire army, ended up super totally dead.
• Filch Walder Frey came out of nowhere and basically took over the North in one fell swoop with a creepy giggle.
• Daenerys exuded the most girl power ever, kicked ass, took names, and  now has tens of thousands of followers and soldiers.
• THE DRAGONS ARE GETTING BIGGER!
• My Boyfriend Jon Snow finally got some (I can’t hate on Ygritte – she’s too awesome), but sadly his days with the Wildlings are over due to him not wanting to prove himself to them by killing an innocent.
• The wildlings still plan on overtaking Castle Black, which everyone else is still like “haha yeah nice try.”
• Bran is a Warg, which is like Professor X’s mutant ability but he can enter the minds of animals. And Hodor.
• Jamie Lannister got his hand cut off, and he’s super butthurt about it. I mean, understandably so, but now he can’t be an amazing swordsman so he doesn’t have much else going for him.
• Brienne of Tarth can kick all of your asses. At once.
• Tyrion married Sansa out of duty, but didn’t sleep with her because he’s a good dude. Cersei disproves, is still a total bitch.
• Margaery Tyrell is  playing the Lannisters like chess pieces and it’s fantastic.
• Arya is holed up with The Brotherhood of Mutants and discovers the Lord of Light isn’t such a tall tale.
• Gendry is sold to Melisandre for eye candy and spell things but I didn’t notice because GODDAMN.
• Stannis and Melisandre witness Stannis’ victory inside the fire, while burning 3 leeches symbolizing Robb Stark, Balon Greyjoy, and Joffrey Baratheon. See the first point for how that turned out for Robb.
• Theon Greyjoy and The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Everything.

That isn’t even all the highlights.

“Hey baby, wanna get with the biggest douche ever?”

I’m stoked as hell for this season, so be on the lookout for every piece of preview material I can find. Hit me up at [email protected] if you find something before I do, and I’ll absolutely give you credit in the post!