Four Reasons to Stay Neutral in the Console Wars

If you’re a gamer, it’s one of the most exciting times of the decade, the 2013 console wars have arrived! The release of a new console generation is always a fun time as developers and publishers hoping to earn a rather large chunk of your gaming dollar push their hardware and game design skills to the max. It’s exhilarating to hear the prophets of technology rallying their faithful to the digital holy war.

Here’s why it sucks for you.

1. Exclusivity is Anti-Consumer

One of the major things publishers do to distinguish their console from their competitors’ is the launch of exclusive games or franchises. While this is an excellent strategy for console manufacturers, it is absolutely brutal for everyone else. By signing up for either side, you are going to be gated out of some of the best gaming experiences. Sure, you could buy both consoles, but that is expensive and you probably aren’t going to be able to afford to get them at launch. This is bad for publishers too. I would have loved to tell Nathan Drake to shut up and take my money, but alas I had an X-Box and could not join in on his international grave robbing. Exclusivity is also artificial as…

2. Games Consoles Are Technologically Interchangeable

Back in the old cartridge days, game consoles ran on custom built proprietary technology. The innards of a Sega and a Nintendo were quite different, and older consoles were even worse. Even last generation, Sony commissioned a special architecture for the PS3’s processor in order to encourage exclusivity by making games fiendishly difficult to port (this is also why the PS4 is not backwards compatible). However, in this generation every console is just a mass-produced, limited-use gaming PC with a terrible operating system. Sure, there may be some difference in terms of mega-flops and reticulating splines, but only the true purist will ever notice. For everyone else, its like getting a bigger TV. You admire it for a bit, and then forget about the size and watch the program.

3. Its All About Control

If you’ve been following the gaming news surrounding these consoles, you are probably aware of Microsoft’s E3 press conference where they cheerfully described the X-Box One in terms that made it sound like the omnipresent wall-screens of George Orwell’s 1984. Microsoft later recanted and gave in to demands for more consumer control, BUT ONLY BECAUSE THEY WERE LOSING TO SONY. Microsoft wanted complete control of your gaming experience in order to milk your money-udders dry, and the only reason Sony didn’t announce the same thing was the negative reaction the crowd gave Microsoft. By taking sides in the console war, you are essentially choosing your own jailer.

4. Console Wars Destroy Society

I’m serious here. Are we such creatures of violence and tribalism that when there is no enemy and we stop judging humans on their differing melanin levels, we hate others based on their choice of toy? Seriously? Humanity, get your head out of your arse and look around. This kind of thing is cute when you are in the bronze age but now its just freakin’ sad.

I’m not saying don’t buy a console. Buy either an XBox One or a PS4; they are both fine machines and some of the games look damn fine as well (like Zoo Tycoon). Just don’t verbally assault those who bought the other one.

Seriously, the animals in Zoo Tycoon are beautiful.

I shouldn’t be surprised that I need to explain this. As a PC Gamer I’m just that much better…

…please don’t burn down my house.