Don’t Worry, The ‘Labyrinth’ Movie Announcement Is Not A Remake.

I woke up to a very distressing text message this afternoon, informing me that a local radio announcer had just stated that Tim Burton was going to be remaking 1986’s cult legend (and my personal favourite movie of everything ever) Labyrinth, and Johnny Depp was most likely going to be taking the role of David Bowie‘s Goblin King.

Uh…hell to the no.

So I did what any other Labyrinth-obsessed person would do (after yelling about it for a bit), and took to the internet to find a real, credible source for this announcement.

What I found, was solace.

FALSE ALARM, PEOPLE.

According to every source I could find, any evidence concerning Burton OR Depp is at least a year old, and nothing beyond “it’s been talked about”. I’m not sure where the radio announcer got her information from, but she’s freaked out a lot of people over a pretty big error.

As for recent/accurate news, I hit the jackpot on Deadline, learning that the film in question has nothing to do with the original except for the title, and well, most(?) of the main plot.

Walt Disney Pictures has acquired Labyrinth, a pitch by Larry Brenner for an action/adventure story about the journey of the mythical princess who must enter the complex and dangerous Labyrinth to save her father. […] Labyrinth will be produced by Jim Whitaker, whose Whitaker Entertainment executives Elizabeth Ingold and Adam Borba helped develop the pitch. Brenner is repped by Resolution, Magnet Management and Stone, Meyer, Genow, Smelkinson & Binder.

Normal teenage girl who must enter the complex and dangerous Labyrinth to save her baby brother vs Mythical princess who must enter the complex and dangerous Labyrinth to save her father?

Hmm. I’m going to be keeping a close eye on this one.