‘Dinosaur Erotica’ Is A Thing; The World Must Know.

Christie Sims may just be a genius. Over the past year or so, she’s been relentlessly pumping out dozens of kindle books about…get this…’Dinosaur Beast Erotica’. The genre is quite straightforward, according to the author’s bio:

Hi! I’m just a plain old, everyday Midwestern girl that lives a normal life. However, while my outward tastes are relatively simple, my inner thoughts are filled with lusty thoughts of big, strong, powerful monsters having their way with beautiful maidens.

Yuuuup. A quick search of Amazon pulls up over 60 titles, several also co-written by Alara Branwen, and rather than featuring the typical giant muscly Fabio type dude as the object of desire…the stories revolve around dinosaurs, dragons, demons, trolls, orcs, gryphons, various were-beasts…you get the idea.

Laura Beck over at Jezebel took one for the team and downloaded “In The Velociraptor’s Nest” (the titles range from $2-$3)…here’s an excerpt:

Azog stood, back to the wall, clad only in damp buckskins, waiting for the beast to slash at her torso until she lay helpless and bleeding on the damp cave floor. She wondered if it would kill her first, or if her limbs would be sliced from her body as the beast gorged on her.

Instead, it reached out with a classed hand to snatch at her damp animal hide as it clung to one shoulder. Azog felt the kiss of sharp claws against her skin as the hide slid from her shoulder and exposed on naked, heaving breast. The raptor paused, curious, sniffing at her as she pressed desperately against the wall.

A reptilian tongue, stiff and hot, dashed out to lick at the tender, naked flesh so suddenly exposed. Azog gasped at the touch, then gradually relaxed as her body warmed to the intoxicating sensation of the beast’s flesh against her own.

She wasn’t sure if her sudden arousal was because of her earlier thwarted climax in the cool stream, or if she was just desperate for one last pleasant sensation before being torn limb from limb by the great, scaly beast. Either way, Azog relished the rasp of its tongue, hot and rough, on her sensitive skin.

 

There’s also a fantastic little live blog reading of The Orc Chief’s Virgin Tribute and Ravaged By The Triceratops.

…I love the internet.